41 Things Every Man and Woman Should Know: Preface

A few weeks ago, I recieved a MySpace bulletin from a friend of mine. The title caught my eye: “41 Things Every Woman Should Know”.

I thought that it would, perhaps, be the familiar posting about women and rape, or some sort of silly list of Carrie Bradshaw-type advice. You know what I’m talking about…”Never wear red shoes, because he’ll think you’re fast! Always keep an extra thong in your purse!”

Upon opening it, though, I was very surprised. The posting was a complete, smart, comprehensive list of common sense things that women forget when in the pursuit of a man. Honestly speaking, many of them kicked me in the gut. Some of them made me flush in embarrassment. But they made me think,and think hard, about what I look for in an intimate relationship.

In the pursuit of romantic fulfillment, many of us, male and female, compromise our dignity, our boundaries, and our true selves. We give these things away and allow them to be abused, all for the sake of someone hopefully seeing this sacrifice as evidence of their desire. Such giving is done for many reasons, both altruistic and selfish. We give because it’s what expected, even if our intuition is screaming against it.

For 41 weeks, I’m going to take a point from the list and write my thoughts on it. I do this to open discussion among both men and women about what we expect from others, as well as what we expect for ourselves. Through this, I hope to experience with you positive growth and the recognition of your true value in this world. Mostly, though, I want us to come to the conclusion that we are worth so much more than what we’re commonly being offered, and that we deserve more than the shabby treatment that many of us accept in the name of “dating”.

A small ‘lil note…being that I’m a woman, and writing from my own experience, I talk about men. Trust me, this is equal opportunity advice for straight, bi, and gay people.

Related Posts:

41 Things, 12/2/06: They Stay, They Go

41 Things, 12/11/06: Excuses And Thier Abuses


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~ by isiskali on December 2, 2006.

4 Responses to “41 Things Every Man and Woman Should Know: Preface”

  1. I was of course linked through your myspace, and there is so much truth in your words its ridiculous. It almost explains a bit of what happened in the most recent experience I had, mainly on the compromising of ones boundaries and limitations.

    I think it really is a self-esteem issue with a lot of women, myself included I must admit, that a lot of us seem to be afraid of being alone. It then causes it to sacrifice ourselves and a few of our ethical boundaries because we find some sort of companionship. Most times when we do this, of course the outcome is not particularly pleasant or at all what we want.

    I am glad I stumbled on your journal. Its actually much nicer then livejournal and I am tempted to get one of my own lol


  2. Right. I think that we see things in terms of having to fill a gap in our lives, rather than being whole already and just adding to things.

  3. […] 41 Things: Preface […]

  4. […] 41 Things: Preface […]

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